Being a SAHM can be terribly difficult at times. There is the laundry, the dishes, the yardwork, bills to pay, butts to wipe, meals to prepare, and on and on. If a smart woman isn't careful, she can easily lose focus of why she decided to stay home in the first place. None of us become SAHMs so that we can focus more on housework, though. No, we leave our careers and degrees behind for the softer side of being a SAHM. What is the soft side, you may ask?
It's moments like this. When we take our kids to a pond to see the tadpoles. It's when we snuggle up under a blanket with them on a cool spring morning and squeeze in a reading of Frog and Toad before breakfast because we're not in a hurry to leave the house. It's a baby asleep on our lap while we type a blog post with one hand. These sweet moments are why we stayed home in the first place.
I'll admit, though, that there are times when I have difficulty remembering this fact. I'm a hard-wired first born, type-A, and it's just not in my nature to go play in the sand box when I have housework to do. I struggle with this! But does being like this make me the kind of SAHM that I really want to be?
I was reminded of the softer side of being a SAHM when I re-read Dr. Laura Schlessinger's book In Praise of Stay at Home Moms (affiliate link). The passage that gave me a much-needed kick in the pants was, "Perfect, neat-freak SAHMs miss sweet time enjoying kids." I think she's right. On days when I am preoccupied with being perfect, I am logically not putting the kids first. I'm missing out on the big picture. Ouch!
I wish I didn't have to work at being more flexible and playful, but I do. My best days at home begin with reading to and playing with the kids on the play room floor. Seriously. They seem to be calmer (which in turn helps me be calmer). On days when I focus too much on the housework, the kids are more antsy and harder to keep happy. They want their mama's attention. And who can blame them?
Do any of you sometimes forget to put the softer side of being a SAHM first? For those of you who naturally put relationships before housework, what tips do you have for us Type As? Please comment below!
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