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Your First Day as a SAHM: Do's & Don'ts

7/19/2011

1 Comment

 
I clearly remember my first day home with my son ... alone with my son (and I guess the dog was there, too). I was terrified. My husband was back to work. Now what?

I sat on my purple couch on that hot July morning, not knowing what to do until my husband got back. There was no real schedule. I nursed on demand. Changed a diaper when needed. Let the dog out when he looked at me in that "I-need-to-go-out" sort of way. I felt like I was lost at sea except for the cues to feed myself, the baby, and the dog.

So what do I suggest to brand-spankin'-new SAHMs on their first day home? What can you do to make your first day home a success? How can you avoid the overwhelm of feeling like there is a whole day and you have no idea where to begin? Here's my list:

Don't:
  • Run errands. Leaving the house isn't going to teach you much. You have to be home to learn to be home. Also, you'll wear yourself out quickly. Remember, you're still recovering from childbirth!
  • Stay on the phone all day. Sure, a quick call to Mama or your sister are fine, but being on the phone so much is a way to avoid learning the ropes.
  • For that matter, I'm including being on the the Internet for more than 15 minutes. Another avoidance technique. Very clever! 
  • Do any more housework that washing 10 dishes and doing 1 load of laundry. Ease into the chores aspect of being a SAHM because right now the baby and your healing is more important.
  • Worry. You are going to be a great SAHM. Your child is wonderful. Your finances are going to handle you being home. The economy will recover. You will be able to zip a pair of jeans again.
Do:
  • Shower in the morning before your husband leaves. Put on "day clothes" (these are different than the clothes you wore to bed last night!). Do something with your hair.
  • Talk with, cuddle, read to, and sing to the baby. This is the prime reason you are home - to mother your child. It's helpful to even experienced SAHMs to remember that the kids are the priority. It's tempting to get off-track. I can attest to that!
  • Nap when the baby naps. Old advice ... and still good!
  • Feed yourself small, healthy meals. Raw fruits and vegetables, plenty of water, a good sandwich, soup, or whatever. Avoid coffee, soda, and junk food. I recommend having your husband already wash, cut, prepare, and store your snacks and lunch for you the night before.
  • Go for a short walk in your neighborhood in the late morning or early afternoon (if your bleeding is down and you're feeling up to it). There's less traffic and people around at these times and it's a good time to get some fresh air. 
  • Fill in your baby book. It's best to write the details of the birth or little memories now - when you remember them! This is a sweet and sentimental time. Write about what you did on your first day home together.
  • Write one or two thank-you notes to people who gave gifts or made meals for you. Keep it to just one or two so you're not overwhelmed.
After you do these "Do" items, your husband will be back from work and you will wonder how the day went by so quickly. You will wonder why SAHMs think this gig is so hard. You will be wonderfully and naively tricked into thinking you are a natural SAHM - because you started off on the right food. And that counts for a lot!! Welcome to the club!
1 Comment
Amy
9/2/2011 03:52:44 am

I love your list of things to do & to not do. I didn't become a sahm until our oldest was 8 but the list would have been helpful even then. Adjusting to life as a sahm was hard, its wonderful that you are here to help the new ones on their journey.

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    Shannon Rinckey

    Expert at everything that doesn't work for Stay at Home Moms (SAHMs)! Master's level Marriage & Family Counselor.  Wild about my husband.
    SAHM of 6!

    Surprisingly funny!

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